Period shame persists because menstruation has long been surrounded by taboos, myths, and cultural beliefs that shape how people think, feel, and live during their periods.
These taboos can affect emotional wellbeing, confidence, daily routines, and even access to education or social spaces. Talking openly about periods helps challenge misinformation, build understanding, and ensure that menstruation is recognised as a natural part of life, not something to hide.
What is shame?
Shame is a powerful emotion which comes from a fear of exposure and our flaws being seen, causing people to feel that your whole self is wrong, defective, unacceptable, or damaged.
Why do we feel shameful?
When those around us have attitudes of devaluation or contempt towards us, when they treat us in a blaming fashion, and when we internalise the image and voice of a shaming person or parent, we become subject to a shame-based identity.
Why does it happen and how does it differ from guilt?
Period shaming happens when an individual is shamed as a consequence of their periods, for example if someone has a blood leak which results in a visible blood stain on clothing.
You may have been shamed for leaking or for talking about periods in the past, and it is important to understand where it comes from.
Shame vs. Guilt
You may sometimes confuse shame with guilt because these two emotions have similarities, but they are different. Guilt is when youâre making a judgment that something youâve done is wrong.
How does shame start?
Your self-esteem is shaped by your daily experiences of being praised or criticised, lovingly disciplined or punished, and taken care of or neglected. You may become super sensitive to what feels like criticism (even if it isnât) and feel rejected by others. You might feel painful, self-contemptuous, and worthless. Intense feelings of shame can take hold of your self-image and create low self-esteem.
Evidence is increasing that serious problems can occur, such as impacting your mental health, when the sense of shame gets deeply woven into a personâs self-image and sense of self-worth.
Break the cycle of shame
Learn to separate and evaluate whether you are ashamed or if someone else is shaming you. The experience of shame is directly about the self, which is the focus of the problem. In guilt, you are not the focus of the problem, but rather the thing done is the focus.
When you feel guilty about something wrong that you did, you can take steps to make up for it and put it behind. But when you feel ashamed, you feel convinced that you are the thing that is wrong, making it difficult to âcome backâ to feeling more positive about yourself. Therefore, you must break the cycle of shame by not allowing period-shaming to define who you are and viewing your period and period stain as completely normal, which doesnât deserve any shame.
Is menstrual blood dirty?
According to our period activists and religious experts, it is certainly not âdirtyâ!
Menstrual blood is different from the blood that flows in our veins due to its composition and physical properties. A period is a mixture of blood, uterine tissue, mucus lining, and healthy bacteria that shed when an ovulated egg doesnât get fertilised. This means that is has to be clean enough to be able to nurture a baby. A lot of the menstrual stigma and shame stems from the taboo around menstrual blood and the myth that you can hold in your period like pee.
The simple sight of blood stains on clothes in public settings have led to people of all genders being humiliated, shamed, and mocked by their peers which can be traumatising and reinforce period myths. It is time to put a stop this nonsense and humiliation!
A confidence building exercise
Letâs say you’re going to school and you’re wearing your uniform. You donât know what a period is or you are still very new to having a period. Suddenly, a boy in your class asks you what that stain is on your trousers. A girl in your class gasps and tells everyone that youâre bleeding. The toilet is too far away for you to quickly run to and people are starting to stare and whisper. You have period blood on your uniform, everyone is looking at you, and some of them start calling you “dirty”. You feel ashamed and embarrassed.